What exactly is a Home?
Home is where the heart is?
Home can be in a person?
Home is where our story begins?
Home is where memories are created?
I never really pondered over this question until... I was forced by my subconscious to do so.
For a little bit of background, I spent the first 17 years with my family in a small town, Mandi. Some summer vacations in Punjab. Almost 6 years in my college and surroundings in Haryana...almost bordering Delhi. Then one crazy year spread across Belgium, Portugal and a small town in East Germany. Mind you some of the seemingly short stays became home so fast and so dear. Especially in Belgium which was my first stop in Europe. There was a second 'growing up' I went through there. You can say like learning to ride a bike again (wink if you know). And now almost 6 years in Hamburg. I have spent almost as much time away from the childhood town as I spent in it.
Having lived the most time in Hamburg in recent years, you could say that my current home is Hamburg. Especially since it's also really special time as I am trying to make a home with my husband now. Well, I thought the same. But apparently, my subconscious mind disagrees.
Well, anytime I have dreamed about home (literally, dreaming while sleeping), the events of the dream are happening in one of the two rooms in the childhood apartment. No matter if the dream is about college friends, or random people I met in other places who have never heard about Mandi. Whenever I am saying 'let's go home', 100% of the times, it has been the same location. Sometimes I was still bewildered after waking up, laughing at the thought of having a strange combination of people from different time points in my life all gathered up in my childhood room. But my mind cannot comprehend that home could be a different place.
Is it because all my formative memories are there? Is it because I was learning what home and family meant when I was living there? Was I the happiest there? Was I the safest? Most comfortable?
Since writing this draft, I have had dreams where I was at 'home' a couple of times.
Guess where the dream was set ... ;)
